Just had my "performance review" chat with my MICU attending, and he brought up something interesting I never really realized about myself - he noted that I tend to "go on whims, gut-feelings, etc." and that I am too gullible and not skeptical enough.
Odd he would mention that, because most people I know tell me the exact opposite - that I tend to argue everything and my coin-phrase should be "I'm not convinced".
In retrospect, I think what he's noticed is my tendency to believe what people tell me when it's about them - their feelings, events that lead up to their hospital admission, symptoms, etc. but when someone tries to tell me that "Drug X" works great against "Disease Z" I tend to resist strongly. As I reflect on why this might be, a few things come to mind.
1. I know that I lack a lot of social etiquette and empathy/sympathy (especially being able to read emotions/facial expressions). I'm not sure where this deficiency came from, but I think I tend to substitute instead what people tell me instead of what they show on their face. Ironic, indeed, as I'm usually the proponent for "show, don't tell". But when it comes to something that I cannot see, then I can only surmise based on what is told to me.
2. Back to the title of this post - why is it that I tend to believe what people tell me? I think it's because I've noted myself an aversion for telling falsehoods. No, it's not a noble thing, and I do "lie" many times, but for me it's almost always a lie of omission, not commission. I prefer to leave things out and let people draw their own (incorrect) conclusion, knowing that they would do so, because I guess it makes me feel blameless. In truth, I think it's because of my horrible experience as a 1st and 2nd grader where I made up huge fanciful stories with my friends and found that the lies just got bigger and harder to reconcile. I really think it was this experience that taught me it's far easier to let someone else "lie" for you (they do the reconciliation in their own minds). Thus, I feel I project these same ideas to the people I meet, and therefore am much more willing to believe that they say but guard against drawing any invalid conclusions from their statements.
3. When it comes to testing ideas of potency, efficacy, etc., however, I tend to be much more skeptical because I can then examine the data with my own eyes and draw my own conclusions. I usually prefer these types of exercises because I can do them at my own pace, on my own time whereas in conversation with another individual, I have to process and reply in real-time.
Much of this probably makes no sense whatsoever, but I think I learned something about myself yesterday...and have to learn to trust people less, I guess.